Your depression is connected to your insolence and refusal to praise.


WOW – that’s a hardcore statement!

As a therapist, I have often been told that I am blunt, and to the point. I refuse to see a client more than four or possibly five times regarding the same issue!

As such this statement of Rumi’s above resonates well with me and my approach. Lets explore it further.

“Insolence and refusal to praise” Up until now, I had not considered these concepts at all in my understanding of depression. The root cause of depression is anger that has been repressed and internalized. It naturally follows that anger breeds “insolence and refusal to praise”!

Where does your anger come from?

Anger is an emotion that is caused by the secretion of a specific mix of your stress hormones. As such it is the result, or the response to something out side of you. If we observe anger, we will soon notice that it is the result of an expectation that we have not been able to meet.

Ask yourself quickly what that expectation of yourself is. Where does it come from and why do you think that you need to meet it. In most cases, our expectations of ourselves and our behaviour come from society, parents, belief systems, and pier groups.

Take a long, hard look at that expectation. Decide right now if that expectation is appropriate for you today. If it is appropriate, make a point of achieving it. If it is not appropriate, let it go.

once you have gone through this simple process, read Rumi’s statement again… Insolence and inability to praise. The insolence should be diminished, and it will be easy to praise because your anger is no longer holding you back.

Depression is endemic in our societies today because of the unrealistic expectations that we have accepted in our lives. Make a point of breaking that expectation cycle by firstly following your anger to the core of who you are, and secondly by doing something simple every day to make yourself feel good – this could be as simple as making a stranger smile on the bus in the morning!

Go try it – I dare you!




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Filed under Stress Management and Life Coaching

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